So here I sit, wound up and unable to sleep, but exhausted at the same time. I wish I was somewhere, anywhere else. I don't understand why I'm so dissatisfied with everything right now! Perhaps it's the hormones talking.
German exam...tomorrow I guess, finally getting a visit from a Dag friend on Thursday (this time it's for real guys.), going home on Friday, rehearsal and thrifting Saturday, easter/family/back to school sunday... paper due monday...
Before the end of the semester I have...
1 hiking trip
2 short essays
a 20 page paper
3 concerts
1 more archaeology exam
2 more German exams
2 finals
a geneology project
fieldwork and project related to that
an audition for local performances in April
that's off the top of my head. There are probably things I'm forgetting.
And so much emotional trauma to sort through that I'm paralyzed.
I watched Julie and Julia yesterday. It made me want to cook so badly, how I loathe the pathetic kitchens in the dorms.
Am I really so narcississtic that I believe anyone would want to read this shit? Heavens, woman. You're delusional. Maybe. But it's better than being a sour, bitter old hag like you. I'm not the one who gets us screwed over. It's you and your fucking idealistic thinking. I have fun! There's no harm in believing in the world. Shit's not as bad as you think. So you say, but I'm always the one who picks up the pieces. However that may be.
In summation, I hate mediocrity. And I should probably check myself back into therapy. Oy.
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